I mean, just in the last three days, the following strangers or organizations have contacted me - unselfishly - to give me riches beyond anything that I've earned or deserved:
- Ambassador James F. Entwistle
- Paul Crowell (a 110kg metal box marked 'Money')
- Reverend Favor Chinenye
- Jim Harry ($2.5M)
- Nancy Partner (dinner for two at McDonald's)
- Walgreens ($150 gift card)
- Starbucks ($100 gift card)
- CVS ($50 gift card)
Of course, that's not to mention the $2M that Michelle Obama recently emailed me about - apparently they'd found it between and under the seat cushions of Air Force One during their many vacations. Nice to see she's not sore at me for maybe being a bit critical of her idiot husband.
But even if a couple of those are not on the up-and-up (I sure hope I didn't waste $3700 in shipping fees for my 110 kg of 'money' - if it's boxes of quarters, I should still be about $1300 ahead), I do know - at Christmas and throughout the year - that I'm heir to the most high kingdom of our Lord Jesus Christ.
And He hasn't even emailed me asking for an international money order.