Thursday, February 14, 2013

Thursday Tidbits

I read the news - so you don't have to.
  • Fox News reports that the asteroid that's fixing to buzz our planet...has been valued at $195 billion.
  • By whom?!  Christie's?  Sotheby's?  Tarrant Appraisal District?  Ebay - 'buy it now'?  Who's got that listing?
  • Wonder what kind of commission it'll generate?
  • Not to be outdone, I understand some entrepreneurial Nevada women have formed a syndicate to buy it and "sell a little piece of asteroid" to as many buyers as possible.
  • At the Kroger this afternoon, folks were tripping over each other to buy candy and flowers.
  • Not.  Me.
  • When I was married, my wife considered flowers and chocolate a waste of money.  She was sensible in that regard.  I think Valentine's Day is silly - being serious for a moment, but just a moment - I think relationships would be a lot better served by being attentive to one another year 'round instead of buying kitschy cr@p on a made-up holiday.
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  • Yahoo News posts "Hermaphrodite Sea Slug Mates With Throwaway Penis".
  • Upon reading the headline, I thought Lorena Bobbitt was on the loose again, but it turns out the Chromodoris reticulata generates a new disposable *member* for each time at bat, and then sheds its package afterwards.
  • There's probably a human 'women & men' metaphor to be explored there, but I'm gonna let sleeping dogs lie.
  • Who says I'm incapable of exercising good judgement?
  • Mayor Bloomberg now wants to ban foam packaging.
  • First Big Gulps, then guns, now Dixie Cups.  This guy's off the rails.
  • Y'all get the impression that SoCal law enforcement didn't want that former L.A. cop to say anything?
  • Swimming against the tide:  Former Illinois Rep. Debbie Halvorson, a Democrat, is running for disgraced Jesse Jackson, Jr.'s Congressional district seat.  Interestingly, Ms. Halvorson is pro-2nd Amendment, and has an A rating from the National Rifle Association.
  • Finally, a Democrat with a common sense approach to gun laws. I'm gonna watch Delkus tonight to see if Hell has Frozen Over.  (Mr. Blogger, can I score that as an Eagles/Henley reference?)
  • The President supports efforts to discontinue production of the penny.  No fan of the President I, I don't necessarily disagree.  
  • But what will my Daughter and I put on the tracks now when the train passes?
  • And speaking of the President - who understands the current hoopla about drones?  To the extent we're hunting down the Al-qaedae and Taliban - what's the difference between that and an A-10, F-16, or other aircraft, except that the pilot's sitting safely in a BarcaLounger in Area 51 or at Bagram Air Base?
  • Should they start targeting US citizens on American soil, then we have a problem Whitney Houston.  But until and unless that happens, it looks like a Pontiac Tempest in a teapot.  To me.
  • The Circus Blogger reports that Crystal's Pizza Palace in Irving is closing.  It was one of my favorite places in high school and college, but in recent years, it's turned into a dump.
  • KERA is currently running a documentary about radioactive quack medicines and products from the late 19th and early 20th centuries.
  • Can you believe someone manufactured Radium condoms?
  • The mind reels with the marketing possibilities.  Probably would give new meaning to doing the 'Neutron Dance', huh?  I could probably think up more, but I shan't.
  • Do Brazilian iPhones really run on Android instead of iOS?  Well...
  • If Todd the Blogger doesn't get enough delegates in the Pope Primary, I could support Don Novello.
  • On Leno the other night, a 57 year old white former high school basketball coach from Kansas sunk/sank more free throws in 30 seconds than Sir Charles Barkley - by more than 2-to-1.
  • Florida Fugitive Futility - Night 4!  Where's that convict?:
No laser, but it does have EER and illuminated reticle.
  • I read somewhere awhile back that STIs (I guess they're called 'infections' now instead of 'diseases' - who knew?) are prevalent among folks in my age group.  I was concerned, until I learned that, in order to get one, you have to be having sex.
  • Hermaphrodite Sea Slugs, which shed their units after hooking up, probably don't get STIs.
  • Nuclear Nookie - I know I said I wasn't going to think up any more advertising slogans, but I couldn't resist.
  • Actual photo of an STI:
Std Epidemic
  • Tonight's post ran a bit randy, I suppose.
  • I'll probably have to deal with the S116 Standards and Practices division.
  • The venison sausage also has cheese and jalapeño in it.  Yum!


el chupacabra said...

I have seen the machine they would use to XRay your feet to size shoes but yikes- radium condoms?

The Donald said...

Lil' Ricky Roentgen's Raincoat, Proton Protector, My Megaton Monkey, The Plutonium Pickle Prophylactic, Neutron Johnson, The Beta Banana Barrier, Alpha-Atomic Armor, The Uranium Unit, Curie's Corn Husk, Gamma Gigglestick Shield, The One Ion Isotopic Missile Silo - just a few of the quack brands offered back in the day.

OK, so none of that's true. I just made them up...