Do-Over? Some, but not so much...

In a recent post, I linked to a story about a crusty old guy who bummed the mood of a family reunion by saying, if he had it to do all over again (marrying Grandma and all), he wouldn't do it, because it was "too hard".  One of my readers, on the backside of some tribulations of her own, agreed with Gramps.

But I still don't.

Economists use the term "opportunity cost".  It's the implied cost of using resource 'A' (whether money, time, land) for a purpose, versus the benefit of the next best use of the resource.  The opportunity cost of allowing your kids to use a couple of acres for a Little League ballfield might be the foregone profits from grazing livestock or raising a crop on that parcel of land.  You get the idea.

In Gramps example, by not "doing it all over again", he would have saved himself, presumably, much heartache (the "too hard" part), maybe.  But his opportunity cost is the loss of the joy of the family that he had ultimately created (and who apparently didn't fully agree with his logic).

Life is fraught with toil and difficulty.  I've written before that there are parts that I would do differently, based on new knowledge or a better perspective (e.g. a deeper understanding of Christian faith), but when it comes to family, despite what's happened to mine, I would not make any change that would have foregone the amazing kids I have.  And even with the pain resulting from the dissolution of that family, I have the wonderful memories of holding my wife in my arms, the births of our children, important milestone events.  The good with the bad, it's all part of the journey.

A couple of weeks ago, we were searching the aisles of the Family Video, looking for something that could be enjoyed by my 15 year old son and my younger daughter. We found City Slickers.  Most will remember the plot  in which Mitch Robbins (Billy Crystal) seeks to find himself by taking part in an amateur cattle drive (the cattle are not amateurs - they are driven by amateur cowboys).  Robbins and his buddies, each embroiled in his own mid-life issues, relate the experience to their childhood custom of allowing 'do-overs'.

So what's the common denominator?

Simple.  In our lives, we will all experience chapters, and events, often of our own making, that are very painful.  It's just part of the plan.  Sometimes we think we can't undo circumstances, and sometimes that's true.  Sometimes we believe we're so far gone, we can't get back to where we started, and sometimes that's true as well.  But because of something 2000 years ago, we always have a 'do-over', paid for by Jesus' sacrifice, leading the way to redemption.  We can't change the past, but we can follow the Master, and change the future.

Wonder what Gramps would say about that?